I'VE BEEN SO SAD
SINCE YOU SAID MY ACCENT WAS BAD
HE'S WORN A FROWN
THIS CALEDONIAN CLOWN

(CHORUS)
I'M JUST GOING TO HAVE TO LEARN TO HESITATE
TO MAKE SURE MY WORDS
ON YOUR YOUR SAXON EARS DON'T GRATE
BUT I WOULDN'T KNOW A SINGLE WORD TO SAY
IF I FLATTENED ALL THE VOWELS
AND THROW THE 'R' AWAY
YOU SAY THAT IF I WANT TO GET AHEAD
THE LANGUAGE I USE SHOULD BE LEFT FOR DEAD
IT DOESN'T PLEASE YOUR EARS
AND THOUGH YOU TELL IT LIKE A LEG PULL
I THINK YOU'RE STILL FULL OF JOHN BULL
YOU JUST REFUSE TO HEAR

SOME DAYS I STAND
ON YOUR GREEN AND PLEASANT LAND
HOW DARE I SHOW FACE
WHEN MY DICTION IS SUCH A DISGRACE

OH WHAT CAN I DO
TO BE UNDERSTOOD BY YOU
PERHAPS FOR SOME MONEY
I COULD TALK LIKE A BEE DRIPPING HONEY

(CHORU